My Hunger for Learning.

Time: 1:56 a.m.
Where: In my bedroom.
Now Playing: "Radioactive" by Kings of Leon.



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Well, it's been 10 months now of useless vacation for me since I chose to rest my body from hardwork learning in Mapua for 6 months straight and it was a sign that I was making myself late for the others and it was hard to lose grip on something I need. It's like a race to the finish where I need to cross the white line and it will be mission accomplished but my current stature, physically, mentally and probably socially are not enough to beat those other guys and got the upper hand advantage wise.

I felt like a jerk because I have this Scoliosis and dealing it for years and years and if you ask me, if you have this, it's hard to deal life. Seriously. You can't breathe properly at one time and have low condition of you're running or if your are lifting something that heavy. That's where I suffered during my first months as a college student back then.



Again, I felt like a jerk why I pushed my limitations and go to the school that can cause me too much pressure, health-wise and mental wise. A sheer embarrassment on my side to be here loafing around while I am seeing some of my friends' statuses on Facebook about their goals, heartbreaks in learning and success it it (e.g., Ang galing ko, naiapasa ko ang MATH23 ngayon pero sure fail ako sa PHY15 nito bukas kasi hindi ako nagreview). Like that. I am so envious to them and the feeling of achievement is BIG in sight.

In 10 months, I am trying to still learn. Reading some of my books on Plane and Spherical Trigonometry, Solid Mensuration and more. Also, I am learning online, some random quizzes in random college courses. Trying to exercise my brain and not to be a loser to myself because I was inspired on that blog I saw last week about a graduating student this year, and he's not just a graduating one, a Suma Cum Laude one. I read his graduating speech and said that he was one of the victims of procrastination of his high school and early college days where he used to fail. He wasn't at that point, a serious student and then he pursued harder that he deserve and now, he's at the top. A proof that education is for everyone and failing is just a natural instinct to every student. We can rise up again from the grave.

there will come a day for next year, after my sister graduated, then, it's my turn to come back. I will be back in Manila but I am NOT sure if in Intramuros Walls again or in other district. We'll see. The return is near upon me.

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Time: 2:09 a.m.
Where: Still in my bedroom.
Now Playing: "Sweet Disposition" by The Temper Trap.